“When I was growing up, one of my pet peeves was that women often felt like the fun thing would be doing what the guys were doing…I never liked that. I remember being with group of female friends and I was like ‘Why don’t we do our fun thing and [they] can come to us?” Taken from an interview with Katie Dippold, writer of the new Blockbuster ‘The Heat’
So here are my seven reasons why I think men definitely pulled the short straw:
Women are fierce. Women are sassy. Women are sexy as hell! We have a variety of tools at our expense in order to be sexy: hair, make-up, shoes, wardrobe; you don’t need to know what we really look like, you just need to know that we can turn you on. Let’s face it, no matter how powerful or successful you are, you’ll never look as hot as an hourglass shaped woman strutting down to her office in some 6 inch Louboutins. Just ask Gina Torres or Kerry Washington, stars of their US Hit dramas, ‘Suits’ and ‘Scandal’.
2. Our undeniable strength
I don’t know if Beyonce’s chart-topping hit was directed at all women, or just herself, but I must admit, she has a point. For years, women have been celebrated as the nurturers; the carers; the ones who give, sacrifice and love. We’re strong enough to ‘bear the children.’ Then ‘get back to business’. That’s right, on top of the magnanimous responsibilities a woman faces in looking after a home, we are now in the workplace. That means most women now hold down a full-time job and still come home to look after the children and/or home. And that’s ofttimes even without a man to help out. You can judge by how big a deal is made out of mother’s day or you can judge by how much of men’s traditional ‘gender roles’ women have managed to take on, as well as their own (working, sports, wearing trousers etc), but either way, the facts are still clear: Women can do everything men can do (and even better), in lipstick and a pair of heels.
3. We make excellent multi-taskers
For years, dare I even say centuries, women have been multi-tasking. Research done by scientists at the telegraph concludes that “women are better at being able to stand back and reflect for a moment while they are juggling other things.” You name it, we’ve done it. Washing up and feeding [Check] Grocery shopping and school runs [Check] Cooking and cleaning [Really?] Careers and raising families [Check] Working hard and still looking good [Can I get a….please?]
4. We get to be cat-called
And isn’t it every human’s dream, every hardworking man’s desire to walk down the street and not be seen as anything other than an object for somebody’s sexual desire? I don’t know about you, but everytime I leave my house, my only hope is that someone will look past my mind that I’ve worked so hard to sharpen, my sparkling personality, my stance which clearly indicates I’m not in the mood for social chit-chat and simply see me for the walking sex toy that I am, and subsequently serenade me with animal noises that any self-respecting woman truly deserves.
5. We can always rely on our ‘Feminine Wiles’
This one is the greatest. How awesome is it that we don’t have to study or work as hard as men because when the chips are down, all we need to do is how a little skin and a promise of more, and just like that, we’ve made our way a few inches up the corporate ladder. Never mind that most of us actually do work hard to refine our talent, accumulate qualifications and do what’s required to succeed and still receive less pay than our male counterparts (“The Fawcett Society says that women still earn 14.9% less on average than men for the same job.” BBC reports). Never mind that after years of hard work and sacrifice, men still think its a compliment to tell us we are only in that position because they found us attractive. And never mind that the world, for the most part, still sees ambitious women as annoying and unnecessary, yet praise ambitious men for the exact same achievements. Never mind, at least we got there right?
6.We get to be judged on Marital status
And how even more incredible is it that a woman can work as hard, even twice as hard as a man and still be seen as a failure because she didn’t choose to fall into the arms of some man and ‘start a family’. I think Paul Feig (Hollywood’s ‘accidental’ feminist) said it best when he said “I hate films that imply that [people] who choose a career ‘missed out’ on a family. If they didn’t choose that, that’s cool. Maybe they’re busy fighting crime instead” Well put, Paul; if only society saw it this way.
And do we even need to mention the God-like perception people have of men who are still single at 40 compared to the haunting glares they give women in the same position? I didn’t think so.
7. We get to be on trial for our own rape
Now this one is the funniest. And though I am aware that it happens to men too, unlike women, men are never excused from the burdens of ‘victimhood’ by saying they were ‘asking for it’ on account of how they were dressed, or how much they drank or for being naive enough to talk to an all-male group. It is quite amusing that people actually think a woman, or any human, can ever ask to be raped. And the poor men, slaves of their own aggressive lust, had no choice but to force themselves into this ‘hussy’ because she managed to make the crucial mistake of thinking he was a decent human being.
Yes, how truly sweet it is to be a woman.
Now I have a long way to go before I can call myself a feminist. I still adhere to my traditionalist views, which believe that women should look after the home and men should look after the women. However, I do think how you interpret that is different for every individual (and couple) and that everybody should be able to pursue their passions and interests on a level playing field (or should be entitled to the same rights and scrutiny), regardless of their race or gender. If that makes me a feminist, so be it. And if you believe in equality for all, then just maybe, you’re a feminist too.
Thoughts, comments and questions, always welcome